Constantly scribbling from Manila to Amsterdam
Marlon and I finally got to do the one thing we’d been itching to do since painting the chalkboard wall in Tala’s nursery: draw on it! It only took one rainy afternoon (lots of those in Amsterdam) to turn our blank “canvas” from this…
into this.
Want a closer look at the details?
Tala is two months old!
Well, yesterday really. But what the hey.
So many changes in the past month. Physically, she’s begun to feel grow heavy and solid in my arms, less a soft floppy newborn and more a robust mini-Marlon. Her hair has grown, covering her ears and giving her kind of a miniature mullet. It’s also starting to lie flat the longer it grows, which makes me suspect she won’t be rocking the spiky baby punk ‘do for much longer. Her skin is starting to look more like mine (fair) than Marlon’s (brown).
Her habits are changing, too. From two to three hours between boobs feeds, Tala can now go for four to five hours at a stretch. Theoretically that would give me a nice chunk of time to myself, but she’s awake longer too. No longer the newborn put to immediate sleep by milk, she stays up for about an hour after she feeds. She’ll scratch her ears or rub her eyes on my chest if I’m carrying her, then I’ll know she’s tired and needs to nap.
I feel like I know her now, and it makes my job easier in that I expend less time and effort struggling to figure things out. Most of the time I can tell if she can be soothed by a pacifier or needs cuddling; I know if she’s head-butting me or rubbing her forehead on my chest, I should put her down for a nap; I can differentiate between the cries that say tummy trouble and the ones that say hunger.
The most gratifying development I’ve seen this month is that she’s begun to respond to her environment. After mostly just crying or sleeping, to behold the beginnings of happiness, excitement and curiosity on her face is a thrill, and a deeply satisfying pleasure.
Studying herself intently in my iPhone screen
She spends most baths with her mouth open. A special bathtime kind of pleasure?
Excitement, complete with flailing arms and kicking legs
Surprised by a camera click
Best of all, my daughter now smiles when she sees me. Sometimes (not often, but it happens), she will stop fussing once she sees my face.
“Does it make you happy to see me, Tala?” I’ve asked her, in that high-pitched sing-song all parents develop. “It makes me happy to see you too.” It makes me happy in a quiet, deep-in-my-chest kind of way, and hugs, kisses and smiles can’t express it enough.
I find that as a mother, I’m growing right along with my baby. People have told me, “Don’t worry, it gets easier.” After two months, I’d say “You get used to it” would be more accurate. I knew I was starting to get the hang of things when, sometime between weeks 6 and 7, I started to crave travel again and could easily see myself traveling with Tala. (Now if only we had her passport!)
Some things do get easier, but new challenges also arise. I enjoy Tala way more now compared to a month ago; I’d even go as far as to say I’m having fun! But I’m also starting to struggle with the repetitiveness of certain tasks, like washing my pump and her bottle…. gaaaah. To think I only bottle-feed her once a day!
I suppose like anything else, you have to put in some grunt work to be able to enjoy the best bits. And this month, I think the best bits—her smile, her alert eyes, her growing body—have multiplied and become even better.
Marlon totally scored 10 out of 10 for organizing my first Mother’s Day. After Tala’s breastfast breakfast at 7am, he put me to bed, whisked her out of our bedroom and let me sleep in until her next feed at 11am. As the mother of an eight week-old baby, you think you’ll never ever sleep in until 11am again, so this was definitely the right way to get the party started.
I woke up to breakfast in bed: chocolate chip pancakes with maple syrup (a hard-to-find commodity in the Netherlands) and bacon. No pictures, sorry—I demolished everything before I remembered the camera!
Then it was off to a top-secret location for my Mother’s Day surprise. He put me on the wrong tram and took me the long way around the block to throw me off, but eventually we reached it: The Conservatorium Hotel on Museumplein, and in its basement, the Akasha Spa.
Obviously I couldn’t take pictures of people in a spa state of undress, so all spa images are via The Conservatorium.
He deposited me at the spa, took the baby, and disappeared for the next five hours. Left to my own devices, what was I supposed to do?
Image via The Conservatorium
Nothing. That was the plan, apparently: for me to do absolutely nothing. To do nothing in the steaming marble hammam, or the Finnish sauna, or the pool, for five blissful hours.
Image via The Conservatorium
Oh, right, I had an Ayurveda massage. But I didn’t have to do anything there either, just lay there like a blob while hot sesame oil was slathered all over me. I hate hard massages, so this soft and gentle treatment was perfect for me. My husband, he knows me well.
I’m not a spa addict, but after the beating my body took from pregnancy, birth and caring for a newborn, this was like being reborn. After gorging myself on idleness, I emerged from this sleek and gleaming paradise of pampering to meet Marlon and Tala upstairs in the hotel. I had been here only once before, and this time I got to take a closer look… and take pictures, of course!
The nursery project continues!
We received quite a few cards from friends when my baby was born (ah, what graciousness can be enabled by a postal system that actually works). I used to have them taped up to the wall next to her changing mat, and noticed that Tala really liked looking at them during diaper changers.
After reading that babies like faces, I decided to replace the cards with something a little more useful to her at this stage of development. The thought of real people’s faces pasted on my wall creeped me out, so I figured art and illustration was the way to go.
An online art project called Feed Your Soul helped me curate this mini art gallery of faces for Tala. This site features a free downloadable art print every month, from artists and illustrators invited to contribute by Jen Wallace of the blog Indie Fixx.
I first found this online art project after Googling Rinske Dekker, an illustrator and Etsy seller I discovered at Dutch Design Week. Rinske’s free art print from is on the right, next to the flower-crowned girl by Croatian illustrator Irena Sophia.
and the dreamy colors of this girl with her head in the clouds, by Laura Amiss. I don’t know why I gravitate more towards female figures… all our figurative paintings at home are of women, too.
With some of my favorite cards from friends, plus our friendly felt unicorn, Tala’s little art gallery is complete. She loves looking at it, and she’s even started trying to touch some of the prints. It will be fun to update it every now and then with fresh finds.
Though the project ended in 2011, the Feed Your Soul page has lots more free downloadable art prints to choose from (not all of them are this girly). So you can download and print your own mini art gallery, too!
Tala’s nursery is a work in progress, and it’s finally starting to come together. When I have a bit of spare time and energy I work on little touches here and there. And I’m having fun!
I’ve been looking for ways to help Tala develop her visual acuity, so one of my recent projects was a DIY mobile to hang over her changing mat, for her to look at during nappy changes. After window shopping for baby mobiles online, I realized that many of them are made for adults to look at—that is, pretty from the side but not from below, which is the baby’s perspective.
Luckily, one of my baby shower gifts was a pack of pop-out paper ornaments by Dutch designer Jurianne Matter. Putting together a DIY mobile with these was super easy. I simply popped out the ornaments, folded them as per instructions on the package, and strung them with varying lengths of embroidery thread from a wooden embroidery hoop, which I then wrapped with washi tape.
Not only are the ornaments cute, colorful (love the touches of neon!) and graphic, but they also fold out into 3D shapes, making them interesting to look at from the underside—not just for mommy, but for baby too.
The ornaments are still pretty thin and low-contrast for Tala at this stage, but she’s started looking at them more and more. I blow gently at the top of the mobile to get the circles moving and draw her interest. I love seeing her try to focus on the shapes, knowing that they are getting clearer as her vision develops.
I have a few other projects in the works, so more nursery details to come!
April 30 is Queen’s Day in the Netherlands, the biggest holiday of the year. This year’s Queen’s Day was extra special: it’s the last one in this generation, as Queen Beatrix abdicated in favor of her son Willem-Alexander, who was crowned King in Amsterdam yesterday.
Starting next year, Queen’s Day becomes King’s Day, and will move from the 30th to the 26th of April. Though the dates might change, the festivities never will. If you ever find yourself in Amsterdam on Queen’s—er, King’s Day, here’s how to celebrate it like a local.
1) Score a bargain.
Love pawing through strangers’ rubbish? You’ll love Queen’s Day. Amsterdam becomes one big flea market, with residents cleaning out attics and staking out places on the pavement days in advance. Find the biggest square or most central thoroughfare in your neighborhood—for us, it was Haarlemmerdijk, which was mobbed—and pack a shopping bag.
Most of the sellers are little kids, so be warned: they will use the cute factor to their advantage. But don’t be afraid to haggle! Even if you don’t score any deals, walking around and exploring the city-wide flea market is the best way to soak up the party atmosphere.
While gathering inspiration for how to decorate the baby room, I saw an unbelievable number of animal heads. Stags, rhinos, bears, stuffed and mounted on walls like hunting was a kindergarten pastime. Along with chevron prints, cloud pillows and moustaches, animal heads seemed to be a huge trend in the world of children’s rooms. I just didn’t get it.
“I’ll never put an animal head in my child’s room,” I sniffed, adding this to a growing list of “when I am a mom, I will never”—a list that includes posting pictures of Tala when she’s sick, or making her feel guilty about what I went through when I was pregnant and in labor.
Anyway. I ate my words when I saw this unicorn trophy from Planet Fur, an Etsy shop filled with whimsical, hand-sewn felt creatures by Dutch blogger, crafter shop owner Marlous Snijders. I simply had to have it.
All my “I-will-nevers” faded in the face of my lifelong unicorn obsession. I first discovered them in a book when I was five, and it was love at first sight. I collected them all throughout grade school, and consider A Swiftly Tilting Planet by Madeline L’Engle one of my favorite young adult books ever because one of the main characters is a unicorn. I even have a unicorn tattoo.
Marloes made my daughter her very own unicorn trophy using the pink and gray color palette of Tala’s room. Now, this little guardian presides over diaper changes from the wall beside her changing mat. Maybe he (or she?) needs a name… what do you think?
The photos from Tala’s newborn photography session arrived yesterday… and I can’t stop looking at them! These were taken when Tala was a little over three weeks old, and already I can’t believe how small she was just two short weeks ago.
Not only did lifestyle photographer Melody Rae do a wonderful job capturing our home and our family in these images, but she was also generous with them—we received over a hundred post-processed photos, with color and black-and-white versions of each. That way we can just choose which ones we want to print, without having to pay a set price for prints.
I love the way the photos all feel so relaxed, like it would be on a regular Sunday at home. We couldn’t have gotten this same vibe at a studio. It’s hard to choose favorites, but here are some of mine.
A while back, I blogged about my desire for a traditional Filipino duyan, or hanging bassinet, for the baby. My mom presented me with one last Christmas, and after lots of plastic cling wrap and two plane rides, our duyan arrived safely in Amsterdam.
Plain rattan didn’t quite go with our baby room’s color scheme, so Marlon and I decided to give the traditional duyan a bit of a modern makeover. Inspired by the ombre trend, Marlon and I used leftover paint from our baby room bookshelves to create a gradient effect. We applied three shades of powdery pink, starting with the lightest shade then and blending them as we went along.
After revamping the duyan, we had to find a place for it. I wanted Tala to sleep in our room in the early months, but we didn’t have enough space to hang the duyan by the bed.
Since we had found a great deal on a second-hand Stokke Sleepi, Marlon and I decided to make that her main crib and install the duyan on the balcony instead. Luckily, our apartment’s previous owners used to hang a hammock on the balcony, and they’d left a few heavy-duty hooks in the ceiling. Marlon tapped into his inner Boy Scout to rig the rope and secure it with a few well-placed knots…
… and voila! One fully functional duyan, ready for gentle breezes and sunny days.
With the arrival of a long-delayed spring, we’re finally getting to use the duyan. We had great sunny weather last weekend, so we put the mattress and beddings from her Stokke crib in it and put her down for a nap while we enjoyed our first al fresco lunch of the season.
So many of my baby essentials are from home. The makeshift sun shade is one of our dozens of bird’s eye cloth diapers from Landmark, and it’s secured with pastel bull clips from National Bookstore. This is a Filipino baby, after all!
Now that we’ve managed to import and install a traditional Filipino duyan, I’d love to get more use out of it. If only it was as easy to bring over some Filipino sunshine!
One of the highlights of my week was learning how to carry Tala in a wrap. Babywearing, the practice of carrying a baby on the body in a sling, wrap or carrier, was something I really wanted to try.
While I was pregnant, I made my own DIY wrap inspired by the Moby Wrap. This popular brand-name wrap is basically a long piece of fabric that enables you to carry the baby close to your body, distributing weight over your back and freeing up your arms.
Making my own wrap was as simple as buying five meters of cotton jersey for €3 per meter. I didn’t even need to hem or serge it because this type of fabric doesn’t unravel. A slightly stretchy fabric like cotton jersey is suitable for wrapping newborns up to about 15 lbs; after that, more supportive fabrics like linen or cotton are recommended.
After a few false starts and many Youtube videos (this tutorial was the one that finally did it for me), I finally succeeded in putting Tala in a wrap. From then on, life with our newborn just got easier.
There are lots of reasons to try—and love—babywearing. According to this article, babies worn in a sling or carrier fuss less—apparently, 43 percent less than babies who aren’t.
At this age, Tala can’t handle too much stimulation; facing inwards against me, she’s less likely to be overstimulated by the outside world. Instead, she’s comforted by things she knows: the sound of my heartbeat, the smell of my skin, the closeness of my body.
She can sleep for hours this way, and sleep can only be a good thing for both mother and baby. She’ll even sleep past feeding time, only waking up for a feed if I take her out of the wrap. Bonus: she doesn’t wake up ready to attack the boob like a ravenous barracuda. That’s happened before and believe me, it’s not my favorite thing.
After nearly three weeks of having my arms full, it’s awesome to use my arms again. I’ve vacuumed, cleaned the kitchen, blogged, put on makeup, even cooked and ate meals, all while wearing Tala. Okay, I did have to pick rice out of her hair a few times. But she never seems to mind… she’s always conked out, asleep!
Finally, I just love to have her this close to me—”close enough to kiss” is the rule of thumb for front carrying. To me, it’s the closest thing to being pregnant again. It’s instinctive and natural, to be able to go about my day without having to think about how to take care of her.
As for Daddy… well, Marlon loves it! I think he was sold when using the sling gave him a few precious hours to catch up on UFC and wrestling after dinner one evening. He says we’ll keep her in it until she’s 15.
So far, I’ve only used the wrap at home. My next babywearing adventure will be stepping out with Tala in it, and getting things done in the world beyond our door. Stay tuned!
